Archive | January, 2014

Another of my fantasies… I want her to touch me..

29 Jan

Would This Be How It Happens???? I imagine myself with another woman… I always been curious and seen it on movies but I never had the courage and never done it before… I enjoy seeing two women make love to each other the way they arouse each other… The way they understand what the other needs….

I imagine meeting a woman someone one who brings my urges to a halt… that will make me wet with desire… that will hold my hand and lead me to an ecstasy only she will be able to give me…

I want to feel her soft hands caress my neck, back as she kisses me… I want to feel her lips softly on mine as her soft tongue eagerly wants meet my tongue… I want her to be gentle for I am a swan ready to run afraid of what I might discover… I want her to kiss me with such passion show me that a woman is all about… as she kisses me she holds me so gentle yet with a firmness… for she knows I am scared… she starts leading the way… I kiss her back with such force that even I surprise myself… she goes done my neck… nibbles, kisses and gently lets me know where she is going… she undress me with a look in her eyes that tells me she wants me and she could only see me… she lets my dress fall to the ground and slowly starts nibbling the top of my breast and than she exposes my breast they both fall out eager to be touched by her.. she sees my huge nipples standing erect but does not see that passion that is dripping from between my legs… for I am enjoying the tenderness… she slowly licks one nipple while she has her fingers between the other.. Slowly she goes back and forth teaching me how a woman is suppose to love and enjoy another… I am paralyzed with such erotic pleasure… she looks into my eyes and could hear my breathing go shallow… and than she opens my legs so gently like a flower that has not been touch by another. She touches it so lightly… and lets her hands wonder all over my petal.. she slowly rubs it between her fingers she knows now how much I am desiring her but not sure what to do… she guides me and teaches me what I need to do to please her… she starts to undress herself slowly and holds my hands and lead me to her breast and holds the back of my neck and gently pushes my lips to her soft skin for its silky and so soft… I start nibbling and find her rosebud… and place it in my mouth… I gently start sucking it flickering it with my tongue… as my hands roam her skin to feel the softness of her curves… and she does the same to me… she leads me to the bed… and lays me down…

Here she begins again… to start the fire that is already burning with desire… she starts all over again… kissing me and I am returning it as fierce as she giving it to me… she spreads my legs and I spread hers but not sure what to do next so she shows me first… she gently rubs my clit between her fingers and I do the same… I feel myself tantalizing all over feel my legs get weaken with pleasure… than she slowly goes for my breast once again they are aching for her tongue her mouth…she knows how to suck them so good she knows they are like rosebuds ready to be played with and works herself down to through my stomach and she meets what I been hoping all night… she kisses me between my legs teasing me as she goes… and than her hot soft tongue meets my sweet aching nectar… I feel like I going to exploded but not yet and she knows this… she teases it… flickering it and than she sticks two of her fingers into my pussy while her tongue never leaving my pleasure spot… I feel myself ready to exploded but at that moment she starts playing with my ass… first she teases it from the outside next thing I know her finger is inside at the same time she never stops paying attention to my clit… she licks it so slowly but steady… so hard but so gentle… I am going nuts… I feel myself trembling…I am moving my hips to her rhythm .. she once again knows this and places her fingers back into my pussy but than she stops and places her soft tongue inside… I am going insane I am no longer able to control myself and I release my pleasure and she enjoys my juices she drinks it like a madman… but does she stop no… she wants more… but I want to please her. I want to show her want she has opened for me… I grab her face and start kissing her with such passion… and work myself like she did to meet what I been craving… her taste her pleasure point her… her swollen clit… not sure what to do she guides me she shows me what I must do with her for I never had a woman pleasure point so close its standing erect waiting for me to make contact… and I do, she tastes so sweet so unique not from what I am accustomed to… I could feel her warmth her heat… I place my fingers into her just like she did for me the way I like to masturbate… I am enjoying the way I take my time to explore with my tongue knowing she is enjoying herself… I slowly want to savory this moment… she moves her hips to my movement just like I just done before… I continue to swallow her juices as she moves continue to feel the heat on my fingers as they go in and out… and than all of suddenly I feel this liquid this liquid I can not explain… all of suddenly I see her body tremble with pleasure see her skin have this pleasing look as a woman should have when pleased…

I wonder if this is how it would be for me.. for I imagine so much more…

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Haven’t been in the mood…

23 Jan

DEAR…

I haven’t really felt like writing and since I was on vacation it made it even worse. Though I lay in bed all day watching the women’s channel and ID doing nothing but veggie out. I did go away for a few days I ended up somewhere up Northern California. I needed to get away. I needed to clear my mind. I ended up in a town where electricity was only available the last 10 years. Where the market was a small convenient store and the local hang out only had 3 people and they all left before 10 pm. It’s amazing what is out there. I had to do some major thinking, some major re-evaluation on everything. I wanted to start off the New Year with positive changes in my life; of course I did not make any resolutions.

Here are my changes…

1) Start going out to where I will find other people to become friends with. New friends, single friends so signed up for Single Meet Ups… Its not speed dating but people who are my age who have things in common. Music, nudity anything basically.
2) Stop giving Alan so much of me. I need to hold back and realize that he deserves me but to a point for he can never offer me what I truly deserve but for now I will enjoy him. I stopped saying “I love you” and changed it to “like.”
3) New job, I have too much time and not working as I should and need to work to my potential so I can keep myself out of trouble.
4) I need to give men chances maybe they are not exactly what I want but I shouldn’t judge them in the first 5 minutes but get to know them. Maybe I will find a new friend or not. I need to actually start saying, “Yes” to men who ask me out. I need to stop comparing them to Alan, for there really won’t be another.
5) I need to stop hiding and literally put myself out there. I been hanging at the local waterhole because it was safe and I wouldn’t get myself in trouble for everyone already knows me. So its time to expose myself.
6) I need to realize that Alan will lie to me if he could again if the opportunity would arise. However, I do know he is the man I should live out my sexual fantasies with. I realized I can not lie to myself I love this man but he is not the one I will grow old with. But he will be someone I will remember forever.

I came to realize that I am ready to meet a man that I can start a life with but this time it will be different. I know I am not perfect but neither is he and he will never be Alan. So I been busier than usual and going out there meeting new people I haven’t found anyone but still fun meeting new people. I do know now what I want and what I will settle for not sure what it will bring but it will be fun exploring.